Saturday, November 21, 2009

Christmas Shopping Advice for Women

MELKSHAM, UNITED KINGDOM - DECEMBER 01: Christ...Image by Getty Images via Daylife
Here's an article from the UK, but the information is sound and surprisingly funny!

This article was written by a man to assist women buying presents for the man in their lives by helping them think "like a man".  Most women will tell you that buying for a man is the most difficult present they have to get, so this article comes at the right time.  Read on ladies and learn how to really please your man this Christmas!

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Author: Scott Morein Published: 20th November 2009 10:35
Following our recent article offering some invaluable advice on the subject of how to shop successfully for women this Christmas (Christmas Shopping Advice for Men), regular AboutMyArea visitor Scott Morein offers a riposte on behalf of the menfolk of Neston...

8 out of 10 women in Neston say the single most delightful thing about Christmas is spending fantastically extensive amounts of time in shops, finding the right gift for the man / significant other (delete as appropriate) in their life.

Christmas giftIt has been said that 75% of all statistics are made up on the spot, however this particular little pearl of wisdom is from the informed position of one who has had to so the waiting, whilst women spend extensive amounts of time in shops.
This time is not spent finding the right gift for the man / significant other, it is just time spent being indecisive and preparing a mental inventory of every stock item that might be different from whence they last frequented the store only a day or so earlier.
Some women believe that men are generally lazy and disorganised, and this is the force behind the lack of motivation for the shopping trip. Men generally however, like you to think this, and will use subtle methods to entrench this belief in the fairer mind.
There are of course some women who believe to the very depths of their core that they know what men want from the shops, but on behalf of the more subtle sex, a few hints, tips and suggestions that will not necessarily make your shopping easier, but hopefully, will make it more successful.
Size Does Matter
The thought and beauty of a well-crafted piece of jewellery, or carefully considered book will always receive thanks but inside, he is crushed to the core. Big parcels, regardless of content are always successful. Ideally, big parcels containing multiple items, regardless of any relationship between the items, is even better.
Premature Presentation Is Good
Any parent will know that once it is known a gift exists in the house, great anticipation and anxiety commences within the heart of the recipient. Men prefer to get it over with, and rarely see the point in delaying this with a lengthy exhaustive build up to a certain climactic date and time. If you have it, let him have it.
Apply The Mother Test
If your Mother would either disapprove or not understand, then you are half way there.
Boys And Their Toys
Some oft repeat the axiom that boys don't grow up; their toys just get bigger. A good rule of thumb is that if it requires construction or is self-propelled, and has 'for ages 8 & over' written on the box, then this will be just fine.
Socks, Pants & Jumpers
Socks: Good.
Pants: Fine.
Jumpers: No.
HelicopterIt's Not About Him, It's About Who He Used To Be
Do not under any circumstance proffer anything that is intentioned to change habits, behaviours or interests. He became entrenched in his ways on the way home from school aged 13 so there is no point trying. Self help books, exercise regimes, grooming products etc. will all generate polite thanks to you, and misery in him.
No Car/Motorcycle Accessories
He may have his heart set on some car accessory or similar, but even if you have found the exact manufacturer's specification & barcode for the item that he is considering having tattooed on the inside of his eyelids, do not buy it;  it will not be the right one. Don't ask me to explain, just trust me on this one.
Lingerie
This is a lifestyle choice beyond the remit of these comments.
So to conclude, make it big, make it quick, make sure your mother disapproves, ensure it will occupy great amounts of his time, respect his mental age but above all, ignore what he thinks he wants. Men rarely if ever know their own mind.
Scott Morein

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